Sunday, October 18, 2009

July 27, 2009 (from my private journal)-

Since the amnio results have come back almost a month ago things have been in a lull. My husband and I haven't spoken about the baby's cleft and life has been continuing as usual, sometimes, for a brief moment I forget about it.


I sent an e-mail to my aunts and uncles telling them about the baby's cleft and told our family that they can share this info with family and friends.  I feel that the more people that know, the easier it will be when the baby is born.  I think my husband is not sure what to tell his co-workers.  He's a police officer and they always post up a sign in the precinct when a new baby is born, I think he's hesitant because he doesn't know what to say or how people will react.  They do the same at my workplace, I'm a dance teacher at a large school.  I know that my students are anxious to see the sign go up and I too am finding myself wondering if I will send a picture as I did with my son three years ago (no cleft).  I'm concerned about reactions that I will not be there to tend to, I don't want pity for the baby or us for that matter but I sure don't want people looking at the picture saying things like "oh my god what is wrong with that baby", yet I want to be a proud Mommy and show off my new little one.  It all seems so petty but these are the things I think about.

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